Monday, April 08, 2013

For the most Beautiful...

It was a joyous occasion on Mount Olympus. Okay, it wasn't actually joyous, but it was festive. The hero Peleus and the sea nymph Thetis were set to tie the knot. Granted, the wedding was happening because Thetis was already pregnant, and she was pregnant as a result of Peleus forcing himself on her- but still- YAY! There was going to be a wedding, and not long after that, a baby- a baby who would be known as Achilles, one of the greatest heroes of his age.

All the gods had been invited, and all had accepted. After all- when you're immortal it's hard to book yourself for all eternity, no matter how important you are.

Okay... not ALL the gods had actually been invited. Eris, the goddess of strife, had deliberately and conspicuously been left off the guest list.

This pissed Eris off beyond belief. Who had been there for Thetis so many times when they were kids, helping her recover from encounters one asshole sea god after another? Who had held Thetis's hair back when they had gotten drunk on ambrosia? Eris felt like she was owed at least the decency of being included among the other divinities, so she definitely felt slighted when she was excluded from Thetis and Peleus's not-quite-but-kinda-really-shotgun-wedding.

So she did what any slighted god would do: she devised a way to punish mankind for her anger.

Standing outside the party's gates, she took lovely apple from a nearby tree, and fastened a message to it reading τἦ κάλλιστῃ; "for the most beautiful."

She threw it over the wall.

A fight began immediately among Hera, Aphrodite, and Athena about which of them deserved the apple most. Zeus was selected as judge, but he wisely deferred to Hermes, saying his son was a much better judge of beauty. Hermes, too, decided this case was too hot to handle.... "but," he said, "I can take you to a shepherd on the hillsides of Troy who is the greatest judge of beauty man has ever known."

The shepherd was Paris.

He chose Aphrodite as the most beautiful.

In return, she promised him the most beautiful woman in the world.

That woman was Helen of Sparta...

...soon to become Helen of Troy.



Art by me...
Story by(my love...) Sarah Lima...

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